CAN ANYTHING BE DONE ABOUT BULLYING?

This past Monday, Marjorie Raymond, a 15-year-old Quebecker killed her self.  She could no longer abide the cruel bullying that she had to endure over a long period.  In a suicide note she wrote, “It’s hard to leave this world but I think it will be for a better world elsewhere.” Her mother believes that most of her daughter’s tormentors were girls.

Marjorie’s parents turned to school authorities.  Several times the bullies were supsended for a few days.  But the bullying continued on on Facebook and on text messages.

Yesterday the Ontario government introduced legislation that would require that bullies be expelled from the school.

I daresay that most of us have been bullied.  A guy in Hastings where I  grew up used to wait at the end of the bridge and pummel me on a regular basis.

My father went to see his parents and I think the bul lying stopped.

Have you ever been bullied?

Can anything be done about bullying?

What do you think?

7 Comments »

  1. 1

    Bullying seems to be part of the human condition-some just need to push around other people.

    Yes, I was bullied as a child,and i was lucky that my friends-pretty strong guys themselves-would help me out. I would try to fight back,but just wasn`t very good at it.

    There doesn`t seem to be a one-size-fits -all answer,though from listening to talk shows,fighting back is generally accepted. It may not always work, but at least the bully will knw that it`s not a free ride.

    One on-line psychologist said that a bulied child should always go for help,and not get into fighting back. I though that this was terrible advice , and it simply told a child that he could never take care of himslef , and would destroy his confidence for a long time.

  2. 2

    I would not suggest to confront a bully… except in a dark alley, (That would be my strategy!) Fighting could result in getting the worst of it….except in the dark alley. I like the element of surprise. Bullies are usually cowards.
    Schools seem to have “kids will be kids” attitude. I suggest they get the kids and the parents together for a meeting, but there is a likelihood that parents of the bullies wouldn’t show up. (you would be shocked at how few parents show up for parent teacher meetings and doubly shocked at how many parents are just plain stupid) That, of course is part of the problem…a whole generation of kids who haven’t been well brought up. (putting it mildly).
    Surely there are some motivational ideas out there: Bullies could get suspended & loose marks-too much would result in a failure.
    Publishing the names of the bullies on a “bully site” for each school.

  3. 3
    Neil McKenty Says:

    philsfancy,

    So would you favour all kids taking up boxing?

  4. 4

    Neil;
    Attitiude is vital. That`s why many parents send their kids to karate class-it teaches confidence,which is probably more important than any moves they could learn in a reasonable time.

    From what i`ve gathered a simple move or two,practised,will be fine. The main thing is not to be afraid.

    I still remember getting into another fight with Charlie. I swung wildly and bloodied his lip. It still feels good to think about it.

    And Little patti, backing down and hoping for some dark alley doesn`t work. It just teaches the poor kid that he should always back down.

  5. 5
    Heidi Gulatee Says:

    I was bullied as a child but I defended myself or ran away when a whole gang wanted to beat me up. One on one I would not be afraid, I used to fight with boys because I was very strong as a child. I do not even remember if I did say anything at home.
    My son was bullied at high school because he looked different, his Dad was from India and he was called Paki. I guess the children did not know that there is a difference between Indians and Pakistanis. I agonized what to do about it because I did not want to make it worse for my son.
    Finally when he had enough he threw one of the tormentors down a flight of stairs and that stopped the bullying. There were no teachers around otherwise he would have been in trouble.
    I do find that the bullies seem to get more attention than the victims. Today I would talk to a teacher and ask to have a meeting with the bully and his parents.
    It just seems that school authorities do not deal well with bullies and it can be very difficult to go to school each day. I do not know what happens if a bully gets thrown off a public school. I know that private schools sometimes suspend bullies or exclude them from attending .
    At the public school it seems more difficult because there is also an obligation to teach a child. To put a bully in another school where he knows no one may help sometimes.
    It is a very difficult subject to solve since children are on social pages and a lot of parents have no idea what kind of messages their child sends. Often it is a difficult situation at home and the child does not get enough attention .
    .It is a good start to start thinking and talking about it.

  6. 6
    Neil McKenty Says:

    Heidi,

    Thanks for sharing your personal experience of bullying. The new Ontario legislation will permit the school authorities to expel bullies. But what happens then. Do they quit or try to go to another school? It’s a difficult subject.

  7. 7

    Hi Phil & Heidi- Great comments-
    I have never been hit, so I do have a fear of that. But I do think I could handle myself in a scuffle if I was mad enough, and I would prefer to choose the time & place.
    Kids can be mean. I would like to see a study on the kinds of kids who bully…what is the common denominater?
    We have a family nearby, 4 children close in age and they are all bullies at school. Their home seems to be very nice, parents seem to be very nice and engaged with their kids…but there is something disfunctional -Do kids teach their sibblings?


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